Tagged: Star Wars

Consumption: 2017


I make this list every year, for fun and as a reference. As always, it only reflects things seen for the first time. “POLTERGEIST on TV, 14th viewing” doesn’t make the list. Nor do films not viewed in their entirety, for example, Guy Ritchie’s THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E, which got ejected from the Blu-Ray player after 15 minutes. I’d never seen Henry Cavill in anything before but he seems to emit some kind of anti-charisma particle.

I didn’t bother making a numbered best-of list this year. But if I had, LOGAN would be at the top. It’s perfect. Damn you James Mangold, for making me cry at your Wolverine movie.

Some of my other favorite releases of 2017 include THE BEGUILED, COCO, ATOMIC BLONDE, THOR: RAGANOK, and THE MEYEROWITZ STORIES. Of course, DUNKIRK was impressive – but cold, as is Christopher Nolan’s way. MOTHER! is a movie, alright. Darren Aronofsky swings for the fences. And whatever you think of the film, Jennifer Lawrence and Michelle Pfieffer were very good. The BLADE RUNNER sequel was amazing, and very nearly great: only Jared Leto’s messianic super-villain seemed out of place, like a character from a different, dumber movie. THE LAST JEDI: wonderful, about 50% of the time. The compelling Rey/Kylo/Luke storyline almost makes up for how they couldn’t find anything interesting for Poe, Finn, or Rose to do. (Yeah I get that the casino plot is a critique of capitalism and arms dealers and yes intellectually that’s interesting for a Star Wars movie but dramatically it was a big bag of nothing and visually it looked cheap & reminded me of the prequels and like this sentence that movie is too long.)

Linked titles take you to my review, or more info on the film.

Manchester by the Sea
La-La Land
Get Out
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (live from the Old Vic)*
Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2
Baby Driver
The Beguiled
Atomic Blonde
Dave Made A Maze
Dawson City: Frozen Time
The Big Sick
Blade Runner 2049
Spoor (Pokot)
Thor: Ragnarok
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Lady Bird
Coco  (saw it January ’18)

The Jungle Book (2016)
The Nice Guys
Shadow of a Doubt
Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children
Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them
The Handmaiden
The Trip (Steve Coogan, not Dennis Hopper)
Back To The Future III
Eat Pray Love
The Meyerowitz Stories
Hidden Figures
The Godfather (pretty good! why didn’t anyone tell me about this flick sooner?)
Personal Shopper

Orphan Black
Modern Family
New Girl
The Good Place
The Expanse
Better Things
Game of Thrones
Downward Dog
I Love Dick
Odd Mom Out
The Orville
Star Trek: Discovery
POV: What Tomorrow Brings
Big Little Lies
Abstract: The Art of Design

Other People’s Trades – Primo Levi
Broken Frontier (graphic novel) – Various
Lightspeed Magazine – Various
A whole bunch of screenplays

*I am calling this a movie. I saw it at a movie theater. Harry Potter guy was in it. It counts.


J.J. Abrams: “I’m through with narrative film”

HOLLYWOOD – April 11, 2013 – In the final weeks before the release of STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS, producer/director J.J. Abrams has revealed that the TREK sequel will be his last traditional feature film. In January of this year, Abrams was contracted to direct the first Disney/Lucasfilm STAR WARS sequel, scheduled for a 2015 release. The future of that project now appears in question.

Abrams departs from the STAR WARS franchise to focus solely on pre-production for his new project, FLARE: INTERNAL LIGHT REFLECTION AND SCATTERING VIA MATERIAL INHOMOGENEITIES. This 6-hour immersive IMAX project will eschew characters and traditional story structure in favor of extended takes of bright point-sources of light.

“I’m through with narrative,” Abrams announced in a press conference held Thursday morning. “I’ve finally admitted to myself that it’s the lens flares that truly interest me. Storytelling? That was always just a means to an end, and if you examine my work you can see I never really had the knack for it anyway.”

Following the release of FLARE, Abrams’ muse will take him even further afield, into the the realms of conceptual art.

Abrams models his goggles

An exultant Abrams at this morning’s press conference: “I can’t see a goddam thing!!”

“FLARE, while non-narrative, was still intended for public consumption, as a communal viewing experience,” Abrams explained. “This next piece will be solely about my personal experience.”

In SQUINT, a performance art piece, a rotating team of gaffers will follow Abrams around 24 hours a day, pointing high-intensity halogen lights right in his face. During the press conference Abrams modeled the specially-designed spectacles he will wear, constructed of multiple layers of cheap glass. These lenses will scatter the incoming light and maximize the amount of glare he’ll see.

A brief Q&A period followed in which Abrams seemed distracted by the chandeliers in the conference room.

“I’ll take some…  uh, questions,” he began. “You in the back, enveloped in the heavenly glow?”

When asked about traditional artistic considerations, such as sharing his experience with others, he was dismissive.

“Fuck the audience,” Abrams quipped.

Abrams left the podium with the assistance of his service dog, Bokeh.

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John Harden is a screenwriter, director, and graphic designer based in the San Francisco Bay Area. He maintains that J. J. Abrams is the new Irwin Allen. He also believes it may still be possible to make a science fiction movie a semi-intelligent grownup could enjoy. You can see him try to make one here.